Thursday, March 09, 2006

BIZARRE MIDWEST MARKETING 101:
Minor League Team to Sell Handheld Heart Attacks

SAUGET, Ill. (ZP) -- Don't bother reading this post if you're a vegetarian, have a weak stomach, or suffer from high cholesterol.

The Frontier League's Gateway Grizzlies will introduce a new sandwich to their concession stand this baseball season.

Billed as "Baseball's Best Burger," the sandwich consists of a beef patty, strips of bacon, and cheese, just like a traditional bacon cheeseburger.

Instead of the traditional bun, the greasy mess is then served on a Krispy Kreme doughnut.

Seriously.

I wish I were kidding.

This is why I got out of the sportswriting business ...

GRIZZLIES INTRODUCE NEW FOOD ITEM FOR '06
Gateway Grizzlies Baseball
Press Release, March 8, 2006

..."We have had the opportunity to bring in a new concession item for the past two seasons and each of them have been very successful. We look forward to Baseball'’s Best Burger and the excitement it will bring to the ballpark," said Grizzlies General Manager Tony Funderburg.

"We are excited to work with the Grizzlies this season on 'Baseball'’s Best Burger,'"” said Tina Bryan, Vice President of Marketing for Sweet Traditions, the local area developer for Krispy Kreme Doughnuts. "Our doughnuts have been used in such things as wedding cakes, bread pudding, fondue, and now a hamburger bun. What a fun and unique way to offer our signature Original Glazed doughnut to Grizzlies fans...."

- ORIGINAL RELEASE HERE -

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5 comments:

EsotericWombat said...

you know, I think I need to try this burger at least once, if for no other reason than to say I did.

cooper said...

I am going to have to say that this makes me kind of sick.

No really sick.

Ms. Monkeythong said...

At least it's not a fried brain sandwich, a St. Louis specialty (Sauget is just east of St. Louis, as in the song "Sauget Wind" by Uncle Tupelo of fabulous Belleville, IL).

The ZenFo Pro said...

Wombat:
Lol...you know, if they made a turkeyburger version I might give it a shot, too.

Cooper:
Lol...I figured that might gross some folks out.

MM:
I've actually had pork brains. Not bad.

Ms. Monkeythong said...

Ewww!

I grew up in a head cheese, ox-tail, braunscheiger, tonuge-eatin' German family, and they wonder why I'm a vegetarian? :-)