Tuesday, October 31, 2006

How, Exactly, A 28-Year-Old Librarian Dodged a Fight with a Jilted Boyfriend


So you think there are some scary rock stars out there, guys who put on some pretty badass shock rock shows...


There is, to this day, nothing more downright creepy than Alice Cooper's performance of "Welcome to my Nightmare" with the Muppets.

To watch the YouTube clip, click here or the image (at left).

Alrighty then...on with this random-ass tale of yet more drama here in Oxford Fucking Ohio... I'll finish the other tale sometime this week - the Richmond incident and the following explanation of a rather fucked Halloween are somewhat related (hint - this is the other side to the Love Triangle thing explained in an earlier post...)

* * * *

If you witnessed tonight's events here in Oxford, in the ZenFo Pro's favorite watering hole, well, you enjoyed some interesting dinner theatre, courtesy of a gentleman I did indeed wrong and a woman who, well, also wronged both of us.

Thanks so much to two readers, two very sweet hard sciences majors, who literally followed me home to make sure I was doing okay emotionally - and bought me two shots at another bar to "cheer me up."

Sometimes, having this blog can be a good thing. There are worse things, I guess, than having two gorgeous young women in "pirate wench" costumes follow one home to make sure a guy they IM occasionally, who they only know as a Profile pic and a nifty CSS, is doing okay. And, well, I rarely turn down free drinks paid for with financial aid money.

[Private note to one of the women: Yes, I did notice the nipple slip, chica. I tried to not look, but, well...I'm a guy. I have a blog. I don't get out much. And I promised your friend that I'd be man enough to admit that here publicly. If a boob falls out, I'm gonna look. It was a nice nipple, really :) ]

As I told these two women, and I'm posting now, I'm an old hat at being the Other Man. It's not something I'm proud of, but, well, I think it must say a lot about the rules of attraction when a friggin' librarian ends up going home with your girlfriend (who said librarian did have sincere feelings for, btw), will let you vent frustrations, and will even refuse to lie about some half-truths.

One of the things I've learned is that there is something to be said for integrity of one's own heart, even when one fucks up. One must always be willing to say, yeah, I'm sorry you were hurt, to take responsibility for their own actions while refusing to take responsibilities for the choices of others.

I've had situations such as this go much, much worse. I've been confronted by Canadians wielding firearms, ready to blow my head off for actually believing a woman when she told me she was marrying the guy for illegitimate reasons. I've been threatened by gang members for flirting with their "Old Ladies" and "bitches" in three fucking time zones.

As the gentleman who was wronged weeks ago stated succinctly tonight, well, I do indeed have some big balls on me. And, in all honesty, for the gentleman in question to confront me honestly, to quit playing childish games and cut through the machismo long enough to accept that, well, two people can be played by the same person.

There was no violence, no petty cliche fistfights, despite (probably) both of us being ready to have at it in a crowded bar. That's a testament to both of our having some rather big balls.

I will not lie for anyone, not even a jilted lover, not even if it means their relationship will end. We all make our choices in life; sometimes, the choice matters less than our willingness to accept the consequences.

And, well, I'm feeling more at peace than I've felt in a long time. These things never end smoothly, but, well...yeah.

I was the librarian known for going home with, well, attached women, was being the operative word here.

Non-Oxford-Fucking-Ohio readers, well, ya'll apparently missed one hell of a pissing contest tonight.

Happy Halloween!

- Jason


xmichra said...

First - ya.. that was the most creepy meshing of rock to kid Tv.

Second - you really should concider sleeping with unattached women. hehe...

Smurf said...

Jason... Hmm...where to start? Did you know that Alice Cooper lives here in Colorado and is a local disc jockey here?

The other man thing... I have nothing to say about. I have heard both from you, one that you swore them off and two you just don't care anymore, its their problem... so... I am just a little sorry to hear you end up in situations that sometimes harm you.

So you had a Canadian really threaten firearms because a woman was going to marry him for ilegitimate reasons? (Because of my current situation, hearing you or anyone talk of Canadians sparks my attention.)

And one more thing... Jason... WHY DO YOU SOMETIMES TALK ABOUT YOUR JOB AND PROFESSION LIKE YOU ARE A NERD? I was just realizing when you talked about your profession and how women end up at home with you etc... sorta sounded like you view your self as a nerd for that job and you get a kick out of people thinking you are cute. Sorry if that was offensive, but that's kind of the feeling I got.

Happy Late Halloween Man, take care.

Steph said...

What is it about you that attracts women who are already in relationships?

shayna said...

LOL... I have to agree about Alice and the Muppet's... :)

sassinak said...

steph i think it's grass is greener syndrome.

least that's how it feels when i'm getting hit on by yet another married guy...

Jess said...

All im gonna say...

so miami students are so fucking bored that they TEXT MESSAGE each other when two guys start arguing over a girl??? do these kids sport mullets and live in riverside?

sorry miami people. oxford bored me to tears when I was out there in june.

The ZenFo Pro said...

Lol...very good advice, actually. First, though, I've got to learn to care enough to ask again. Think I've been backsliding lately...

Lord, there are days I'm glad, as I told one of the bar managers who witnessed this shit, that I didn't have a frigging blog when I lived in Baton Rouge or California...

Actually, Alice Cooper lives in Phoenix, but his radio show is syndicated throughout the west...really wish I could get it out here, actually.

Re: Canadian nationals with guns...yup. See comment above about why I'm glad I didn't have a blog in, say, Louisiana...


Hey, thanks for stopping by, chica! I found your blog completely by accident and, lol, thanks for dropping by the ol' ZenFo Pro homestead...

What I think it is and what I've been told are two very different things, actually...

Traditionally, it's always been because I listen, I'm engaging in conversation, and, well, I think esp. in rural areas like this, where there are so many people who've grown up sheltered, who've never experienced even a fraction of the things, good and bad, I've experienced, there's the plain "Man of Mystery" factor. While a lot of men my age play video games or pointless drinking games, I'll spend money on a good cocktail every now and then, sit in a bar and discuss everything from the importance of Carl Sandburg, the joy that was 1970s punk music, even American Revolutionary War battles...

Sometimes, I guess, it's appealling for a woman to be treated like an equal, without strings attached. And I think the fact that I supposedly flirt way too much, a la Southerner (honestly, I've never understood why some women will just hook up with anything gives them a compliment), and that I just speak my mind, sincerely, always. Being a good orator and being a bit of a Man Outta Time (a female friend told me last night, for example, that she just finished reading something on the Age of Enlightenment and thought instantly of me for some reason...)...

Probably a longer explanation that you were expecting. Yeah, I do that sometimes ;)

Lol...yeah, that's ten times scarier than most Marilyn Manson videos...

Yup. I agree.

LMAO...nothing like bluntness.

Errr...no comment here, chica.