Zenformation Mail:"Reflective" Sex Lives, My Flat Butt, and Why Library Instruction is Boring

* NOTE - These are e-mails I've received via the Zenformation Professional e-mail link in my profile. I have removed all identifiers in the queries to protect privacy, even of the ZenFo haters. No names from this point on - just cities. I reserve the right to NOT answer questions about my personal life but may answer them privately. I will only post e-mails and responses that specifically ask me to post a response; however, no advertising or hotlinking will be allowed.

E-mail text is unedited (other than identifiers) and some content may be objectionable to some folks.

- Jason,

AKA The Zenformation Professional

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Okay smartass...I've been wading through your psudointellectual bullshit for months now and I think you're a prime example of the treasonous venomous lies the Extreme Left puts out. I wanted you to know i think all youre bitching and moaning about Conservatives (we are the mainstream) is probably reflective in
your sex life. or your a fag.

- OXFORD, OHIO

ZenFo Pro Response:
Dude, I can appreciate your political differences with the content of my blog. I consider myself a populist more than a member of the Extreme Left, but your views are your views. I'm not quite sure how my political views are "reflective" in my sex life. Or how you can surmise that I'm somehow gay based on my writing. Either way, I don't think you're helping further your political orientation by sending nasty e-mails to a blog.

I see you in [a] Library all the time and I've wanted you to know you have a nice ass. Please post this. My friend at [an East Coast] University also reads your site and doesn't think i hav the guts to send you an e-mail :)

- OXFORD, OHIO

ZenFo Pro Response:
No problem. Posted. Obviously you have more guts than your friend believes you do. I appreciate the compliment, but, well, I'll be the first to admit I have a pretty ordinary butt. And thanks for not bringing that up while I'm at work. And, since I'm not sure who I'm answering, please feel free to say hi whenever you're in my library.

My roomate and i are having an argument about plagarism. she says that some profs have software that can pick out stolen papers. i say she's full of shit because students would know about it. who's right???
- PHOENIX, ARIZ.

ZenFo Pro Response:
I hope you didn't bet on this one, because your roomie is indeed correct. There is anti-plagiarism software out there, but a saavy college instructor can spot lifted material a mile away. There are many other tools at their disposal. For a description of the numerous ways faculty can catch a cheat, click here.

You seem like a cool guy and I totally groove out to a lot of the same tunes you do. why the fuck did you become a librarian? And why do my professors always bring in the most boring ppl to show us how to search for books? its like so lame sometimes and i fall asleep.
- NO CITY PROVIDED

Thanks for the compliments. As for why I became a librarian, well, it seemed like a cool thing to do. And I've never regretted it. I had a blast in Library School, actually. As for why your instructors bring in librarians to teach what we call "Bibliographic Instruction," well, it depends on the professor. Some profs really bring in libbies to babysit students; the majority (I hope) actually want academic librarians to teach their students how to be better researchers. If you find yourself bored senseless, you can help improve everyone's experience by sharing your experience with the librarian. It could be he/she has no clue that they're coming across as boring. Librarians are there to help make you a better researcher. Knowing what you need always helps.

I'm just curious. I love your stories about you personal life and i can so relate but what's the strangest thing you've ever had happen to you at your job? You never talk much about your job and i just wanted to know.
- LINCOLN, NEB.

ZenFo Pro Response:
I'm glad somebody can relate, seriously. I choose not to talk much about my professional life because I really have no complaints. I love my job and my colleagues. Perhaps the strangest occurances I've experienced have happened because of this blog. Two weeks ago, a group of female patrons sat on couches for two or three days, huddled around an iBook and staring at me every time I walked by. It really creeped me out a bit, but I ran into one of the women in an elevator the other day. She said she and her friends were afraid to say anything to me because they were intimidated by me and I guess thought I'd make fun of them or something. I dunno...do I come across as intimidating?